Sex Positivity and You

What is Sex Positivity?

Sex positivity, or being sex positive, means having positive attitudes about sex, sexual identity, and sexual behaviors (Ivanski & Kohut, 2017). Being sex positive means being open to thinking and talking about sexual interest, pleasure, and decision making in a non-judgmental and confident way. Check out Salt-N-Pepa's take on what sex positive is.

In the sections below, we cover different aspects of sex positivity like understanding the sex response cycle, what makes someone sex positive, consent, communication, and healthy relationships. The information below will help you learn what sex positivity is and begin to discover what being sex positive could mean and look like for you.

What is the Sex Response Cycle?

The sex response cycle is the bodily reaction that you go through during a sexual experience. Everyone responds differently during sex (Georgiadis & Kringelbach, 2012) and by knowing this, you may be able to think more positively about different sexual experiences, including your own. More information about the sex response cycle.

1. Your own body (physical factors): Each body works differently during sex. Things like the food we eat and how we handle stress impact how our body feels and sexually performs (ODPHP, 2020). The way we think and feel about our body can influence how we think about sex. Being aware of how your body feels and how you feel about your body can help you be more aware of your attitudes toward sex.
2. Your own feelings (emotional factors): Our feelings—even the non-sexual ones—impact how we think about sex. For example, people are less likely to enjoy sex when they are sad or stressed (Waite & Joyner, 2001). The way you feel about your previous sexual experiences can also make it hard to engage in new and healthy sexual relationships (Barkder & Galliher, 2020). If you or someone you know is struggling with feelings from past experiences, there is help available which can be found in the resources within the consent section below.
3. The people around you (social factors): How you view sex can be affected by those around you and the sex education you received. Think about the messages you were given by sex educators. Were they positive and inclusive? Another social factor that impacts the way we think about sex is social media (e.g., Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat etc.), television, and music (Brown, 2010). Media often shows narrow ideas about sex in a way that is not realistic and doesn’t show the most positive parts of real sexual relationships (Brown, 2010). Few of these unrealistic relationships are sex positive or inclusive. Think about the relationships you see in your favorite TV show or online. Are they promoting sex positivity?
   
   Additional resources about influences